Sunday, 22 March 2020

A couple of days ago I thought I would be posting my last entry.  I received a phone call from my mission president, advising me that all senior missionaries were being released and sent home.  I had heard the night before that some of the senior missionaries were being released, but thought it didn't apply to the ROC missionaries.   I cried and prayed.  I didn't want to be released early; I felt I needed to remain here so I could continue to grow in ways I needed and wanted to. 

I called Scott and talked with him, just wanting someone to help me grasp what this meant and what I needed to do next.  His response was to take a deep breath and assurance that I would figure it out.
Within a short time I received a text from Elder and Sister Biggs, asking the other 4 full-time missionaries to meet at the ROC to hand in our fobs (keys to the ROC) and to gather any personal items we may have there.  That turned out to be a healing time for each of us.  None of us wanted to leave our mission early.  We cried, laughed and shared experiences and talked about what we would be doing now.  Each of us had family members living in our homes.

I felt sad for Rachel & Travis.  I had loved having them in my home and hated telling them I was coming home.  I gave them 1 May as the day I would return so they had a little time to find someplace else.

I was kind in a fog all day Thursday.  I made some phone calls, and took care of some business things.  Finally, that evening, I got focused and began pulling things out of cupboard and drawers and packing them up as best I could.  Scott & Julie offered to bring boxes and come to help me get moved to their home where I planned to stay until Rachel & Travis found a place to rent.

Friday morning, I did some more packing.  Scott & Julie arrived with boxes and began getting things boxed and moved to my car and Scott's truck.  We arrived at their home, unloaded everything into their upstairs guest room and I set to work putting things away, organizing things.  Scott & Julie had determined that they could set up a folding table in the bedroom to give me a place to work and study.  That was so thoughtful of them and a huge help form to realize I had a place I could work without interfering with their lives.

I had an appointment with President Andrews for my exit interview, on Saturday at 11:30.  The other full-time ROC missionaries were there (except for Sister Tolman who was already packed up by her kids and headed home).  It was good to see them once more.  President Andrews was very kind and offered a prayer with me.    I tearfully drove to the casita to pick up a few more things, and then to Scott & Julie's to await the 1:00 phone call from President Holt to release me.

President Holt had just received an email from the FH Senior Missionary Coordinator, asking him to offer a couple of options.  Depending on my decision he would release me or not release me.   I couldn't compute what was being said.  He gave me the name and phone number of the sister who had emailed him and suggested I could call her and get more information and could pray about my decision.  He said to take my time.

I had been disappointed and sad to think I was being released, but had accepted it and began looking at the blessings of going home, seeing my family and friends, enjoying my home and yard, including raspberries, blackberries, etc.  And, now, I was being told I could continue my mission, working from home (Scott & Julie's for now) and, when the ROC reopens, continue serving there.

It was a roller coaster of emotions.  I talked with Scott & Julie and I prayed.  An hour or two later, I told Scott & Julie that I wanted to fast and pray about the decision.  She and I went grocery shopping, more talking with Scott, realizing that I was fighting against what I was supposed to do.  I knelt to pray and the Spirit let me know that I needed to stay and finish my mission in whatever way was needed.  The peace that came over me was so comforting.  And that was the end of the turmoil.

So, I will continue to post blogs from time to time until about 14 June 2021.  I am excited but know that things will be different.  I will be the only one of the 6 of us full-time missionaries.  I assume others will be called once this COVID-19 pandemic has ended.